The Big Question: Why We All Want What We Can’t Have?
Can anyone explain as to why grass always looks greener on the other side? Perhaps is it your eyesight that plays trick on you literally? And why is it the things that you can’t have are always the best things in the world?
Why does our ex all of a sudden looked more tempting once they are with someone else? Why do women yearn after taken men? Why do men love girls who are attached or married or beyond their reach? Here comes the dinosaur age question that has continues to pester the singleton as well as the couple everywhere around the world: Why the heck do we lust after someone that we can’t have?
The fact is that when someone is unattainable, he/she definitely looked more appealing than someone who is within your reach. Why? Frankly, many people out there are dying to know. Many discussions have been made, comments exchanged and many rounds of coffee with my friends. And yet, nobody seems to agree on one reason.
After dipping my nose on some of the articles and blogs written by experts, I come to a conclusion that some people didn’t realize what they had until they have lost it and later on trying to salvage it. Deja vu? Yes, it had happened to many people before over and over again.
However, there is a scientific explanation to this. According to Ruthers anthropologist, this is a trait that is imprinted in our human body. Apparently, there is this chemical in our body called dopamine, also known as “pleasure” chemical in the brain which actually increases, the longer it takes for an enjoyment to be fulfilled.
Therefore, in another words, the longer you lust for someone you can’t have, the more pleasurable the whole experience becomes. Sigh...no wonder single women out there are so turned on by taken men.
I couldn’t agree with this statement though. This is because love should be mutual. We should long for someone who is good for us that will love us back and treat us with respect and care. Maybe after many disappointing dates, bad break ups and loveless sex, it’s about time to wake up from your dream instead of wasting your effort and energy going after someone you can’t have.
Or perhaps the reason is just as plain as to avoiding obligations and commitment. In yearning after the unfeasible or unreachable, aren’t we guaranteeing that we will be able to endlessly enjoying the ride, the thrill of the chase without having to make a promise of any kind?
Think about it!
Can anyone explain as to why grass always looks greener on the other side? Perhaps is it your eyesight that plays trick on you literally? And why is it the things that you can’t have are always the best things in the world?
Why does our ex all of a sudden looked more tempting once they are with someone else? Why do women yearn after taken men? Why do men love girls who are attached or married or beyond their reach? Here comes the dinosaur age question that has continues to pester the singleton as well as the couple everywhere around the world: Why the heck do we lust after someone that we can’t have?
The fact is that when someone is unattainable, he/she definitely looked more appealing than someone who is within your reach. Why? Frankly, many people out there are dying to know. Many discussions have been made, comments exchanged and many rounds of coffee with my friends. And yet, nobody seems to agree on one reason.
After dipping my nose on some of the articles and blogs written by experts, I come to a conclusion that some people didn’t realize what they had until they have lost it and later on trying to salvage it. Deja vu? Yes, it had happened to many people before over and over again.
However, there is a scientific explanation to this. According to Ruthers anthropologist, this is a trait that is imprinted in our human body. Apparently, there is this chemical in our body called dopamine, also known as “pleasure” chemical in the brain which actually increases, the longer it takes for an enjoyment to be fulfilled.
Therefore, in another words, the longer you lust for someone you can’t have, the more pleasurable the whole experience becomes. Sigh...no wonder single women out there are so turned on by taken men.
I couldn’t agree with this statement though. This is because love should be mutual. We should long for someone who is good for us that will love us back and treat us with respect and care. Maybe after many disappointing dates, bad break ups and loveless sex, it’s about time to wake up from your dream instead of wasting your effort and energy going after someone you can’t have.
Or perhaps the reason is just as plain as to avoiding obligations and commitment. In yearning after the unfeasible or unreachable, aren’t we guaranteeing that we will be able to endlessly enjoying the ride, the thrill of the chase without having to make a promise of any kind?
Think about it!
posted by Jooey @ 8:26 pm
1 Comments:
At 10:03 pm,
Ti-Lyn said…
I agree that the thrill of the chase is always going to be better than the actual thing, hence why ppl get confused with lust and love.
And the thing about dopamine? I find that very interesting, and believe that to be true. The happier we get, the more we want that feeling to last!
But the dream of something is never going to be as good as finally having someone who you love. True love will be felt in your soul, and the feeling of lust you get with 'the chase' will never be real..
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